Saturday, May 28, 2011

Madame Candidate, had u researched Acme, Inc, you would see their faulty safety record and low consumer scores puts them at risk of imminent harm toward your fine feathered constituency. I, personally, have been in touch with one Wile E. Coyote, Esq, who has found out first hand, on multiple occasions, just how unsafe their product line really is. That is why I believe I am better suited for the presidency. I am, however, looking for a running mate. Right now it's a toss up between you and Mr R. Runner.
Since I have vowed to run a positive campaign I will not mention here, in this public forum, the numerous ambulances chased by Wile E. Coyote, Esq.  Nor will I mention here your F- in elementary spelling.  Making up false research data does not make one a suitable presidential candidate; I make up only true research data, which is why I can be trusted to lead this great nation and its great people to further years of greatness.
Now go away.  You bother me, kid.

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